Mama was right all along!

Just got call from boss: "I need you on TV today. Wear something from the store. See you soon."

Me: "You are kidding, right?"

She wasn't.

Reasons I am freaking out right now:

Bad hair day? Check!

Ate salty food last night? Check!

Worked out this morning w/ trainer and am still bloated? Check!

Started my period today, so I am extra bloated? Check!

Hadn't shaved legs this morning? Check!

Haven't had my hair cut in months? Check!

Haven't had my eyebrows waxed in way to long? Check!

Out of my favorite makeup powder? Check!

Wore a v-neck shirt yesterday and got a mosquito bite on the center of my chest? Check!

Aforementioned mosquito bite very visible in dress I am wearing? Check!

Bad (and I mean bad) hair day? Check!

Holy shit! Maybe I will have a heart attack before we go on air and my boss won't be able to use me! 

Oh, and did I mention my boss is a body shape analysis and style expert and she is using me as as example? I hate my body shape and I definitely don't want it on freakin TV! This is why I went into a career of writing...so I could tell people what to say on TV from BEHIND THE SCENES!

I can hear my mother now, "I told you to always shave your legs, have your eyebrows waxed, etc...you never know who is going to see you and you don't want to ever be seen looking bad."

"But mama, I am never this ragged."

"Well, I guess you picked a bad day to let yourself go, didn't ya sweetie?"